Here I am

Here is a place where I can grow and mature, safely surrounded by love and adoration. May every puppy born be given the life I embark on.

Friday, April 4, 2008


My Momma got broken
Not now 16yrs ago, and she is still broken.
Every year for 16 yrs something inside Momma breaks, my brothers & sisters told me so.
Some years are worse then others, some better, this is a bad year.
Momma came home early, that means extra love and play time, but momma didn't play, she cried, she made horrible noises, I tried to tackle her make her smile make her laugh she always laughs when I wiggle on my back .. Jager got mean he barked and pushed me out of the room while he yelled at me, what did I do wrong??!!! Momma didn't stop those horrible sad noises, Jager and Luna curled up around her quietly and waited, after awhile I very cautiously joined them, Jager gave me a kiss when I quietly curled up in Momma's lap and like Jager & Luna quietly waited.
Momma got up and got in the shower ... no pets, no words, no love in her heart only pain she cried in the shower while we waited around the tub she stayed until the water got to cold and she couldn't stop the shaking. We waited quietly while she dried off, wrapped herself into her robe and took us outside. After awhile Momma curled up in bed and we curled around her, I laid with my head on her breast, quietly wishing Momma would say something, there were no more tears or noises just an unnatural quietness.
Momma finally started to pet, and with my head laid softly on her breast, Jager's head on her hip & Luna curled around her feet she told me the story of Jamie, my brother I never met.
16 yrs ago my brother Jamie was born and died, Momma loves him more then life, there was a big part of her soul ripped from her that day, and she has never learned to heal that gash.
She told me how sorry she was, she knew I was scared & worried, but to know it would all be okay.
We all quietly laid and cried all night this morning she is better not normal for awhile everybody says the craziness will continue for awhile, and will come back next year.. Jager told me